12 Surprising Reasons Why You Keep Attracting Toxic Men

12 Surprising Reasons Why You Keep Attracting Toxic Men

Let’s crack the code and find out the reasons why you keep attracting toxic men and what you can do about it.

12 Surprising Reasons Why You Keep Attracting Toxic Men

Are you ending up with men who take you for granted, manipulate you, or worse just use you for their own pleasure?  Are they using you to fill that relationship void? 

Do you find yourself always ending up in a toxic relationship? 

First of all, I want to let you know It’s not your fault that you are stuck in this toxic and horrible relationship.  So stop blaming yourself. 

I’m certain that you loved this person and that’s why you ended up having a relationship with him. Being in love and loving someone is not a bad thing. 

It’s a wonderful feeling to be in love.

However, it becomes toxic when you are the only person who puts in all the effort to make the relationship work. It’s a toxic relationship if he is always taking you for granted, cheating on you, and lying to you.

Do you keep telling yourself “I have to give him one more chance, I know he will change, I just love him so much that I can’t live my life without him.”? 

Do you find yourself in this same situation?

You keep hoping he will change. You keep hoping he will stop cheating on you, he will stop lying, betraying, and stop taking you for granted. You keep hoping he will stop partying all the time and make you a priority. 

You keep hoping that he will finally realize that you are that one special woman who truly loves him and that he should treat you right because you deserve it.

So what do you do?

All your hopes feel crushed and all you feel is devastation. 

This toxic relationship is already heading into a bad breakup, and now here you are wondering why you keep ending up in a toxic relationship? 

Let’s crack the code and find out the reasons why you keep attracting toxic men and what you can do about it.  Let’s end this cycle of destruction once and for all. 

12 Surprising Reasons Why You Keep Attracting Toxic Men

12 Surprising Reasons Why You Keep Attracting Toxic Men

1. You always give more than you take.

Are the one who always pays the bills? Are you the one who always makes an effort to buy something nice for him? Are you the one who always buys him gifts on special occasions? 

Nothing is wrong with being generous. It’s a wonderful quality to have as a person. However, when it comes to a relationship or even in life in general, if you give too much without limitations, it can end up with that person taking advantage of you.

Toxic men will always take advantage of your generosity. 

A healthy relationship is about balance. It’s about giving and taking. Relationships shouldn’t be one-sided.

2. You’re too nice.

You are just too nice. You always try to be accommodating to your partner and make him happy as possible. Being nice a person is a good thing. However, this can also draw negative people and toxic men into your life.  Ever hear of the saying “No good deed goes unpunished?”

You have to know where to draw the line with your wonderful personality, generosity, and hospitality.  Be nice but not to the point it lets men take advantage of you.

3. You always try to fix people.

When he is at a low point in his life, you try to fix it for him. You are always there to make him whole again. Whenever he feels broken, you are always there and immediately doing everything you can to make him feel better.

Of course nothing is wrong with helping your man. However, it will become toxic if he becomes dependent on you whenever he faces problems in his life.  It’s as if you are the one who’s responsible for everything in your relationship with him. His problems will be your fault. 

Now that’s absolutely toxic!

Let him be a man and not just a boy who always needs a helping hand. If he can’t do this, then he is certainly a toxic man and you need to set yourself free.

4. You forgive and forget too easily.

Whenever he makes a mistake, you easily forgive and forget.  You hope that he won’t do it again. And that’s why he keeps mistreating you. 

5. You don’t set clear boundaries.

It is essential that you know what you really want in a relationship.  You need to know what your limits are and make sure that your man knows them.

If you don’t set clear and defined boundaries, then your relationship is probably in a lot of trouble. Toxic men will just hurt you again and again and use your lack of boundaries to their advantage.

6. You have low self-esteem.

We all struggle with low self-esteem at times. However, if you are constantly struggling and lacking self-esteem, it can bring a negative impact on you and your relationship. 

Your self-esteem can undermine your relationship and this can cause you to end up in a toxic relationship. 

You seriously need to boost your self-confidence first before you jump into a relationship or else you will keep attracting toxic men into your life who will just use your weakness to their own advantage.

RELATED POST: 10 SUREFIRE WAYS TO BOOST YOUR SELF-CONFIDENCE

7. You are obsessed with the idea of being in love.

You are addicted to feeling the need to be in love so you can be complete.

You like to chase love and don’t set standards.  You just settle for anyone who will make you feel complete.

If you don’t learn to love yourself first and know your worth, then you will continuously end up in an endless loop of toxic relationships with toxic men.

8. You are desperate to have a man in your life.

You are desperately seeking to bring a man into your life. You don’t care what type of personality they have; you just want to have one in your life because you think it will make you feel complete. 

You don’t value your worth and that makes men take advantage of you. 

If you don’t know your worth and you are desperate to have a man in your life, then it will be almost impossible for you to find a high-value man who would value you. You most probably will end up with toxic relationships and toxic men.

RELATED POST: TOP 18 INTERESTING TRAITS THAT DEFINE A HIGH VALUE MAN WHO WILL TREAT YOU RIGHT

9. You don’t practice self-care and self-love.

You give too much love to others and you forget how to love yourself first and practice self-care. 

You always look after your man before yourself. I know you love him unconditionally; however, the kind of love that you give is also damaging your self-worth and value. 

Without truly loving yourself first, you will end up in toxic relationships because how can you expect someone to love you if you don’t love yourself first. 

RELATED POST: 18 SELF-CARE HABITS OF SUCCESSFUL AND CONFIDENT WOMEN

10. You are not ready for a new relationship.

You are broken. You just broke free from a toxic relationship. Or you just broke up with someone who hurt you so badly. And here you are again, longing for love because you feel like and you think it will make you feel better. You think it’s better to have someone than to be alone and miserable.

You are not yet totally healed.

Your heart is still mourning and bleeding, but yet you are jumping immediately into a new relationship. 

This is just another vicious cycle of a toxic relationship, because most probably you will end up with a man who will just use your weakness to their advantage while you are lost and broken.

You can’t just jump into a new relationship and expect someone to fix your broken heart. You must heal yourself first. Love yourself first. 

RELATED POST: 77 AMAZING WAYS TO LOVE YOURSELF MORE + FREE PRINTABLE

11. You are afraid to be alone.

You are someone who does not have just low self-esteem, but you depend on your happiness from others. You find yourself feeling empty and lonely without a man in your life. 

You feel like it’s better to have this man rather than to be alone. You are scared because you think you will grow old and alone.  This type of thinking can lead you right back to another toxic relationship. 

You must learn to be alone and be happy.

You must learn to be alone, but not feel lonely. Learn to love yourself and you will be happier and start living your best life. And that’s the time you can only be ready for a new relationship and find a better man who will treat you right. 

Learn the true value of having that time to yourself free of distractions.  Use that alone time to think about what it is you want out of a relationship.

12. You keep hoping that he will turn into something more.

A No strings attached relationship is fine when both people are on the same page. However, it becomes a problem when you find yourself falling in love and hoping that your arrangement will turn into something permanent. 

Of course, it never does.

You are most probably just a warm body for a toxic man to get close to on his lonely nights. 

You seriously need to stop this game if you want a serious long lasting relationship. You need to learn your value and worth as a woman and that’s the time you can find a high-value man who will treat you right

Final Thoughts:

The genuine kindness, generosity, and positivity you bring to the world are truly wonderful gifts. Protect these gifts from negative and toxic people. Invest your time and positive energy in people that will magnify your kind efforts rather than diminish them.

Even though your beautiful traits may lead you to attract toxic people, do not let this stop you from being who you truly are.

Just be more aware and careful of this hard reality so you can better spot dangerous and toxic men. When it arises, take positive action and protect yourself. 

Also, consider that your positive personality can have a huge impact and power to directly transform negativity. Your shining light may be a good example to those who are mean and toxic people.   Think of the possibility your good traits may have on those people.

Lastly, you have every right to leave a toxic relationship and create a peaceful and loving space for yourself.


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