Learn to love yourself even when things are not right.
Learning to love yourself, I say it all the time, is a path that can take time to be explored. And inevitably, there are ups and downs. Only here: you seem to have made great progress, to love yourself better, to accept yourself as you are, to be pretty good about yourself, and suddenly everything collapses.
When you go through a complicated moment in your life, when your body changes, when you have a little more difficulty moving forward, when you have health problems … you may have the impression of going back.
I recently found myself facing this problem. I had emotionally difficult events to manage. After I gave birth, I started to transform my daily life and with all that, a slight weight gain put me in front of my fear of gaining weight.
But I don’t think that means that I took a step back or that I love myself less. It’s just life, and it will get better (spoiler alert: it’s already getting better).
Being aware of this is extremely important because loving and accepting yourself does not mean imposing the search for another perfection, that of always being happy and great about yourself. It is to live with the ups as with the lows.
Set new goals, track your habits, face your challenges and monitor your health as you transcend to becoming the best version of yourself.
Never hesitate to go to a professional
Disclaimer before going further in this article: I am not a therapist, I am not a doctor. Reading articles about self-love, applying my advice to find the right clothes that can help you feel good about yourself, it can help, but it will not necessarily do everything.
If you experience something very difficult or if you really have trouble with your image, if it is something that weighs very heavy on your shoulders, do not hesitate to be accompanied by a doctor or a therapist.
Start by talking to your GP if you don’t know where to go, he or she can listen to you and help you.
Learning to love yourself also means learning to make yourself a priority and to ask for help when you need it . It is going to the doctor if necessary, taking care of the sores of the body but also those of the mind.
LEARNING TO LOVE YOURSELF ALSO MEANS ACCEPTING DIFFICULTIES
I have the impression that when we use terms with a “positive” connotation, we immediately have the impression that this thought erases, even denies, all the negative aspects of life.
After the big wave of positive body, for example, we saw people start talking about body neutrality. We have the feeling that loving ourselves means that we love all the details of our body and that we get rid of all its complexes.
I don’t see things like that at all. I love the positive terms but I don’t think they ignore the negative either.
Learning to love and accept yourself is also learning to get through difficult times. That doesn’t mean they are less painful or shorter, it’s just knowing that you need to take care of yourself even more at these times. And even if it is difficult to feel good in your body at these times, that does not prevent you from loving yourself.
CONSIDER YOURSELF YOUR FIRST FRIEND
A friend who is in bad shape, does she like it less because she is having a difficult time and because she is wearing a little more comfortable and a little less elegant clothes, that she has less desire to go out and that make fewer jokes? Absolutely not.
WHEN NOTHING GOES RIGHT TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF
I told you earlier about the difficulties I had to face. It would be a lie to say that it happened quietly. I was sad, angry, discouraged, tired. But I also did what I needed to do to move forward.
I went to see my doctor, I allowed myself to work a little more in slow motion. I tried to listen to myself. I paid attention to my sleep. I started to exercise at least 2 to 3 times a week. Lots of little things that did not solve my problems in a snap of my fingers, but that helped me move forward, and especially to feel less helpless.
When your life becomes more complicated to manage, it is normal to have the impression that you are walking backwards. You may see thoughts come back that you no longer had.
You may have more trouble with your reflection in the mirror, in your relationship with your body, or more difficulty in feeling good about your clothes.
But the truth is, you’re not backing up. You just have an obstacle to overcome, and all the way you have already traveled, nothing can erase it .
Of course, as I said above, if you are in a difficult period and you find it difficult to get out of it, you must seek professional help without hesitation.
Only in life, the difficult moments are not always moments that require professional help (which is not a reason to tell you “my problem is not important enough to go see someone”, if you feel the need, you go!).
Difficulty loving yourself and feeling good about yourself, it is sometimes reactivated by little things or without you even understanding why .
A little weight gain, fatigue, disappointment, a period of doubt, and nothing is going well. You feel bad and the nice relationship you had built with yourself seems to unravel.
SELF-CARE IS IMPORTANT IN ALL MOMENTS OF YOUR LIFE
Self-care is important in all moments of your life, highs and lows. And in those times when you feel like you are not moving forward, or even going backwards, it is even more important to take care of yourself.
This self-care can go through a lot of things. Take the time to turn off your phone, make your sleep a priority, take a moment every day to do nothing, read light novels that clear your head, walk, offer yourself a relaxing break with your favorite tea, write.
There are plenty of ways to take care of yourself, and it’s up to you to find what really helps you move forward. Whenever you do that, you say to yourself “I love you”, and even if you don’t feel that it changes a lot in your relationship with yourself, believe me, it helps you.
THE POSITIVE WARDROBE TO LEARN TO LOVE YOURSELF
Helping the positive wardrobe to learn to love each other in difficult times
I think your clothes can help you feel like a Wonder Woman, but I think they can also serve you as a crutch when you’re going through a hard time, be it a day, a week of intense PMS, or a period a bit complicated.
To make your wardrobe an ally in this kind of situation, here is what you can try to apply:
Now is not the time to try some crazy stuff.
Even if I think that trying everything that makes you want, and getting out of your comfort zone, it can only help you find your style, when you have trouble feeling good about yourself and your life , you don’t necessarily have the energy for that.
It is completely time to wear everything that is in your clothing comfort zone.
And if you still have a little trouble defining it, it may be in these moments when you feel a little vulnerable that you will be able to draw the outlines and see what really helps you to feel good .
Wear your baby comforter look (a short dress and leggings for me) as much as you want, he is there to support and comfort you. Think comfort but not only.
You can especially have fun with accessories to give more style to your outfit. The point is not to hang around in your pajamas, because that doesn’t really help your self-esteem, but it’s to be comfortable with an outfit that makes you feel like a second skin without having the feeling of neglecting yourself.
It may not be the best time to revolutionize your whole wardrobe (that said, if you feel the need, it can be something that will help you!). But that doesn’t stop you from trying little things that really make you want or make small changes.
Small gestures can do a lot:
A new hairstyle, make-up differently or wear jewelry, it can help you feel better in your sneakers. These little gestures are important for learning to love yourself because they allow you to do something concrete. (and to feel a little less fatalistic) and that they can help you regain confidence in yourself.
The little sufferings in life, they can make you feel like it’s too hard to learn to love yourself. But just because you sometimes find it harder to accept yourself that you don’t. And if you are in a difficult moment right now. I send you lots of support, love, hugs, and good waves.
PS: If you are looking for more ways on how to learn to love yourself unconditionally. Then this book is highly recommended for you. This is for you if you’re having any self-doubt, feeling lost, or just need some insight in your life. :Love Yourself, Heal Your Life Workbook
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If you enjoyed this post, you might also like:
- HOW TO LIVE A MORE FULFILLING AND HAPPY LIFE
- 3 SIMPLE STEPS TO BE HAPPY WITH YOURSELF
- 24 SIMPLE WAYS TO BE MORE MINDFUL IN YOUR DAILY LIFE
- OTHERS ARE NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR OUR HAPPINESS. WE ARE.
- TAKE TIME TO LOVE YOURSELF AND STOP CHASING LOVE
Thanks for reading this post. Be sure to check out the pages above for more LIFE Motivation tips.
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